This is a touchy subject 4 me...bc its hard 2 try and explain 2 ppl y forgiveness is key when it took me so long 2 understand that fact!
We cant really know the depth of our character until we have seen how we act under pressure. It's easy to be kind to someone when they are kind to u, but can u still b kind when that person has hurt or mistreated u?
The first step to forgiveness is self-examination... U have 2 take a step back and look @ urself and MOST of all 4give urself b4 u forgive any1. Some ppl really believe that they have forgave some1...but the reality is if ur still holding a grudge and if u cant even look @ this person u have not forgiven anyone. I say forgive urself 1st bc... when some1 wrongs u, 4 a second u hate them, u wish 4 karma, and @ times u dnt want anything good 2 come there way. Also u sometimes look down or urself and blame urself 4 the situation... @ the end of the day none of those things are right(it's def understandable though) so u have 2 forgive urself for even thinking that way.
*In times of diversity, it's easy to blame others and excuse or own actions. Instead of looking for others to blame, first examine urself and confess ur own sins*
Forgive: To pardon or acquit of sins; new lease of or on life.
God forgives and forgets....I wonder y cnt we?
Sometimes forgiveness seems so far away from being the "Right" thing to do. But u know sometimes forgiveness feels better than hating someone. U know to have hate in ur heart for some1 that means @ one point u had to care 4 them or feel someway 4 them... and it takes more energy to hate some1 then it does to forgive. Hate is long term... while forgiveness...is forgave and forgotten! Get it?!
Forgiveness is sometimes a slow moving process. I would b lying if I said I was able 2 forgive some1 over night. Forgiveness takes patience! For some reason it seems like the person who is doing so wrong is always doing soo good in life, and the ppl they wrong or hurt are suffering. But that only last 4 so long... That's why u must b patient! Dnt worry about what u can do 2 make their life hell like they have made urs... JUST simply pray about it and leave it Gods hands. I can promise u, HE will fix it! I also understand that being patient is sometimes even harder than forgiving!
*If it seems slow...WAIT! PATIENTLY! for it surely wil take place! Although being patient is not easy we must remember that GOD hates sin even more than we do! Punishment of sin will certainly come...We must have trust even when we dnt understand why things like this happen!*
Life is not about feeling cheated or wronged or bitter...its about finding happiness and being completely satisfied with everything u have experienced and everything u have...and being happy about the things u dnt have bc those r the things u honestly jus dnt need or u will become stronger trying to gain!
The reality is we have all done things that we are or once was ashamed about...we have hurt some1....and all we wanted in return was for them to forgive us! Although u probably never verbally said that...U thought about it b4 and u honestly feel that way! So if u want ppl 2 forgive us...y is it so hard 4 U to forgive others?
U have to ask urself questions...u have 2 get into ur own mind and figureout y cnt u forgive...It may b something that happened a long time ago that's holding u bac...and that is OK. Just let urself forgive and let go...and I promise u...u will feel like a better, brand new person! Forgiveness is like a bath!, lol! I couldnt think of any better way to explain! Once u forgive ur heart feels cleansed and free of all the dirt, pain and hurt! It feels like a NEW HEART!...and u know what I believe that this is so true..bc u love differently. More wholeheartedly and more genuine!
All in all, FORGIVE! Those who have hurt u, the ppl who have lied 2 u and most of all urself. Bc what u have 2 realize is...not only have other ppl did all of those things 2 u, u have did them 2 urself also! *U cnt b mad @ some1 4 something u do 2 urself* Nothing is better than the feeling after u have learned how 2 forgive. U grow stronger as well as with more knowledge. The things that hurt us the most...are the things that make us stronger!!!
We need to learn how to handle our anger properly. Anger and grudges can hurt others and destroy relationships with ppl. Grudges can cause us to b bitter and destroy us from within. Anger is a form of weakness...u show ppl that they can get the best of u!
TRUST, FAITH, and the ability to FORGIVE.... 3 basic essentials to being able to love and accept love. 3 basic essentials to being a better person and living a more fulfilling life! 3 basic essentials to just being...HAPPY!
Life is pretty confusing...but it's also a blessing that many ppl arent blessed with for long... so b grateful and appreciate the life u were so graciously blessed with. Mistakes are essential in this life...and learning from them is just essential. Trust that God does have a plan for us....beyond the mistakes, regrets, trials, tribulations and heartaches...Once again EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON...and if it happens know that it was supposed to happen...and forgive the situation as well as person and forget! Only the strong survive.... but remember that the strong ones are not the ones who have just experienced the most and who have fought the most battles, but the ones who are patient, understanding, and forgiving!
Love Life Forever
1Thale
Monday, July 13, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Real Love
What is real love?
I was in a "serious" relationship 4 5years. I shared so many memories (both good and bad) and pain with this person. Just off basic instinct and the fact that I never felt that way before...I called it love..or being in love I should say.
*Love is patent, Love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its on way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes in all things, hopes all things, endures all things*
1Cor 13:4-7
When ur going through all ur wrong and past relationships, u find urself considering some of the craziness things...LOVE!
Love is not time or years...
Love is not pain...
and Love is not lust!
Love is.... Well my love is... Forgetting the wrongs, rejoicing the rights and all the smiles he brings to my face. My love is not questionable. My love is heart warming. My love has the same heartbeat. My love is... thee unimaginable!
It's easy to call something love especially when u have never experienced the real thing. 4 that moment it sounds good. But its everything but that honestly.
Everyone makes mistakes, so there may b a time where ur mate may wrong u... but @ the end of the day its just that...A mistake. Something that is learned from and never done again. Something that makes the relationship stronger. And something ur able 2 forget and just move forward about!
Everybody wants love these days...so we imagine that this person we "think" we love is everything we want and dream of. But yet we still question our feelings. Love is taking a risk. Not jus solely off how u feel but how ur heart feels. This real love is a undeniable feeling and its a feeling u cnt jus walk away from!
When u find this real love... u find urself doing things u prolly would of never did b4 but its okay bc...Somehow, someway...ur HAPPY!
Once u find this love...everything else seems like a an act! Something u rehearsed, and finally memorized and was able 2 perform GREATLY! Real love is no perfomance... its not even thought of, or really understood...but when it reaches u, its LIFE CHANGING! Real love makes u want 2 b a better person, real love makes u love every1 and want every1 2 experience this love that u have! U c good in those u would of never saw good in!
*I never knew how much God loved me, until HE blessed me w/u*
I tell my best friend this all the time! bc its true!.... God saw all my wrongdoings and all the wrongs that came in and out of my life... And HE taught me how 2 b strong and how 2 LOVE myself above any and everything.. AND then u wanna know what HE said... HE said I was ready...
The message is simple... *we go through so many wrongs, so when the right ONE finds us... we know how 2 cherish and love them. LOVE THEM RIGHT!!*
Dnt regret ur past experiences or even so walk away from some1 u question bc the reality is...ur learning! It's all a learning process that has a major pay off in the end!
U gain a friend, a person who loves u flaws and all, some1 who sees the good in u even when u dnt c it urself, a person who will LOVE u, a person who gives u the courage, strength, and confidence 2 want 2 give ur all in every situation. U gain REAL LOVE!
All in all, there is only 1 kind of LOVE.... There is not a in love, and in like and just love. Theres simply NOT. Everything other than love is called GROWTH! Seriously. Ur past is something u should appreciate but it shouldnt be something u have 2 make urself believe or others @ that! When something is real... U will kno and although others may doubt how u feel they know it 2!
The sweetest joy is waking up every morning as well as going 2 sleep every nite knowing that someone LOVES U..IN AND OUT! IN AND OUT!!!!
BUT dnt b fooled... REAL LOVE can b u just finally loving urself unconditionally. U finally appreciating urself and learning as well as valuing ur self worth!
REAL LOVE can b something u share w/ur child....REAL LOVE can b anything thats true 2 u and ur heart! anything that gives u joy above and beyond anything!
Dnt search... jus wait! God has an awesome plan 4 all of us...and Im sure REAL LOVE is wrapped up in there somewhere 2!!
Love Life Forever
1THALE
I was in a "serious" relationship 4 5years. I shared so many memories (both good and bad) and pain with this person. Just off basic instinct and the fact that I never felt that way before...I called it love..or being in love I should say.
*Love is patent, Love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its on way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes in all things, hopes all things, endures all things*
1Cor 13:4-7
When ur going through all ur wrong and past relationships, u find urself considering some of the craziness things...LOVE!
Love is not time or years...
Love is not pain...
and Love is not lust!
Love is.... Well my love is... Forgetting the wrongs, rejoicing the rights and all the smiles he brings to my face. My love is not questionable. My love is heart warming. My love has the same heartbeat. My love is... thee unimaginable!
It's easy to call something love especially when u have never experienced the real thing. 4 that moment it sounds good. But its everything but that honestly.
Everyone makes mistakes, so there may b a time where ur mate may wrong u... but @ the end of the day its just that...A mistake. Something that is learned from and never done again. Something that makes the relationship stronger. And something ur able 2 forget and just move forward about!
Everybody wants love these days...so we imagine that this person we "think" we love is everything we want and dream of. But yet we still question our feelings. Love is taking a risk. Not jus solely off how u feel but how ur heart feels. This real love is a undeniable feeling and its a feeling u cnt jus walk away from!
When u find this real love... u find urself doing things u prolly would of never did b4 but its okay bc...Somehow, someway...ur HAPPY!
Once u find this love...everything else seems like a an act! Something u rehearsed, and finally memorized and was able 2 perform GREATLY! Real love is no perfomance... its not even thought of, or really understood...but when it reaches u, its LIFE CHANGING! Real love makes u want 2 b a better person, real love makes u love every1 and want every1 2 experience this love that u have! U c good in those u would of never saw good in!
*I never knew how much God loved me, until HE blessed me w/u*
I tell my best friend this all the time! bc its true!.... God saw all my wrongdoings and all the wrongs that came in and out of my life... And HE taught me how 2 b strong and how 2 LOVE myself above any and everything.. AND then u wanna know what HE said... HE said I was ready...
The message is simple... *we go through so many wrongs, so when the right ONE finds us... we know how 2 cherish and love them. LOVE THEM RIGHT!!*
Dnt regret ur past experiences or even so walk away from some1 u question bc the reality is...ur learning! It's all a learning process that has a major pay off in the end!
U gain a friend, a person who loves u flaws and all, some1 who sees the good in u even when u dnt c it urself, a person who will LOVE u, a person who gives u the courage, strength, and confidence 2 want 2 give ur all in every situation. U gain REAL LOVE!
All in all, there is only 1 kind of LOVE.... There is not a in love, and in like and just love. Theres simply NOT. Everything other than love is called GROWTH! Seriously. Ur past is something u should appreciate but it shouldnt be something u have 2 make urself believe or others @ that! When something is real... U will kno and although others may doubt how u feel they know it 2!
The sweetest joy is waking up every morning as well as going 2 sleep every nite knowing that someone LOVES U..IN AND OUT! IN AND OUT!!!!
BUT dnt b fooled... REAL LOVE can b u just finally loving urself unconditionally. U finally appreciating urself and learning as well as valuing ur self worth!
REAL LOVE can b something u share w/ur child....REAL LOVE can b anything thats true 2 u and ur heart! anything that gives u joy above and beyond anything!
Dnt search... jus wait! God has an awesome plan 4 all of us...and Im sure REAL LOVE is wrapped up in there somewhere 2!!
Love Life Forever
1THALE
Thursday, July 9, 2009
FRIEND
Life is about finding urself, growing, and establishing meaningful and long term relationships!
*The number one goal in life is 2 love urself, God, and others*....This is very true!
Identity is a hard thing to come by these days! Ppl dnt kno who they are, or they dnt accept and appreciate who they are, or they are considered nothing more than a "group"!
Friends/People are needed in day to day life to help shape and mold u. Ur friends mite actual b more apart of ur growing process than ur actual family. And I wonder y is this?
*Friends teach us, hurt us, and in some cases make us.*
The word friend has gained so many definitions in the past couple of years, and that's jus to my knowledge. I think thas problem 1 when it comes to friendships! We change the definiton to make that simple word mean w/e we want it 2 be. Well lets start off first by defining the word "friend".
FRIEND:
Interesting right???
Friends these days are EXPECTED....yes thas right EXPECTED to meet a certain criteria! Ur expected 2 spend time w/ur "friends", ur expected to always b there 4 ur "friend" and ur expected to b loyal to ur "friends". And trust me the list doesnt stop there, I think these are the ones I hear most frequently.
So the question is are u a good friend?!
So this is where identity comes back into action. When u know who u r, and ur completely content with who u r and what u can provide 4urself, ur expectations of ppl not just friends expire! Probably not completely at one moment but overtime they will. U now take friendship to another level..but we will come back to that at a later date!
Identity also says a lot about the ppl u will befriend as well as the ones that will befriend u.
Some ppl look for "friends" that they can ultimately benefit from. But y? Is this a bad thing, no not at all! Everyones different!
Others look for "right now" friends.... ppl who can keep up w/their fast lifestyle for rite now and some1 who appears to b on the same level as them. And this is not a mental level! More physical.
And lastly u have some ppl who look for a friend who they can talk to, relate to on a more personal level, and some1 they can share meaningful memories with. Someone similar to; family!
The problem is... our definition of friendship today is closely related to ummmm lets c, MARRIAGE! Thou should not hurt thee partner, thou should b there through sickness and health, thou should kiss thee ass, lol!! and all that blahh blahhh blahhh!
We have taking friendship to another level... once u get wrapped up in it ur lost. U loose urself completely, u are not u anymore u are them. U r not loyal to urself and ur feelings and UR HEART ur loyal 2 theirs!
This kind of friendship is easily broken, easily heart broken, and not easy to ever regain once broken.
This may seem like a very blunt place to end but... Friendship should never be filled with expectations bc @ the end of the day thas not what its based off of. Ur not tied or bonded to any friend so make urself believe that. A good friend n my opinion is one who wants 2 b there, a person who I dnt have to talk 2 everyday but I kno that they care, a person who remains themselve in every situation and respects I can only b me. A good friend is a person who wants 2 c u happy, regardless of the situation or the person or even the time!
So in closing.... dnt worry so much about being the "best friend"... worry about being the BEST U! and ultimately u will b the best @ everything! Seriously. Dnt let ppl make expectations regarding u that u wouldnt even make 4 urself. Lets go a step forward... DNT let anyone make expectations 4 u!!! B who u r.... NOT who the group wants u 2 b!
heeeyyyyy r u a good friend???!!!!
Love Life Forever
1THale
*The number one goal in life is 2 love urself, God, and others*....This is very true!
Identity is a hard thing to come by these days! Ppl dnt kno who they are, or they dnt accept and appreciate who they are, or they are considered nothing more than a "group"!
Friends/People are needed in day to day life to help shape and mold u. Ur friends mite actual b more apart of ur growing process than ur actual family. And I wonder y is this?
*Friends teach us, hurt us, and in some cases make us.*
The word friend has gained so many definitions in the past couple of years, and that's jus to my knowledge. I think thas problem 1 when it comes to friendships! We change the definiton to make that simple word mean w/e we want it 2 be. Well lets start off first by defining the word "friend".
FRIEND:
| 1. | a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard. |
| 2. | a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter |
| 3. | a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile |
| 4. | a member of the same nation, party, etc. |
| 5. | (initial capital letter ) a member of the Religious Society of Friends; a Quaker. |
Interesting right???
Friends these days are EXPECTED....yes thas right EXPECTED to meet a certain criteria! Ur expected 2 spend time w/ur "friends", ur expected to always b there 4 ur "friend" and ur expected to b loyal to ur "friends". And trust me the list doesnt stop there, I think these are the ones I hear most frequently.
So the question is are u a good friend?!
So this is where identity comes back into action. When u know who u r, and ur completely content with who u r and what u can provide 4urself, ur expectations of ppl not just friends expire! Probably not completely at one moment but overtime they will. U now take friendship to another level..but we will come back to that at a later date!
Identity also says a lot about the ppl u will befriend as well as the ones that will befriend u.
Some ppl look for "friends" that they can ultimately benefit from. But y? Is this a bad thing, no not at all! Everyones different!
Others look for "right now" friends.... ppl who can keep up w/their fast lifestyle for rite now and some1 who appears to b on the same level as them. And this is not a mental level! More physical.
And lastly u have some ppl who look for a friend who they can talk to, relate to on a more personal level, and some1 they can share meaningful memories with. Someone similar to; family!
The problem is... our definition of friendship today is closely related to ummmm lets c, MARRIAGE! Thou should not hurt thee partner, thou should b there through sickness and health, thou should kiss thee ass, lol!! and all that blahh blahhh blahhh!
We have taking friendship to another level... once u get wrapped up in it ur lost. U loose urself completely, u are not u anymore u are them. U r not loyal to urself and ur feelings and UR HEART ur loyal 2 theirs!
This kind of friendship is easily broken, easily heart broken, and not easy to ever regain once broken.
This may seem like a very blunt place to end but... Friendship should never be filled with expectations bc @ the end of the day thas not what its based off of. Ur not tied or bonded to any friend so make urself believe that. A good friend n my opinion is one who wants 2 b there, a person who I dnt have to talk 2 everyday but I kno that they care, a person who remains themselve in every situation and respects I can only b me. A good friend is a person who wants 2 c u happy, regardless of the situation or the person or even the time!
So in closing.... dnt worry so much about being the "best friend"... worry about being the BEST U! and ultimately u will b the best @ everything! Seriously. Dnt let ppl make expectations regarding u that u wouldnt even make 4 urself. Lets go a step forward... DNT let anyone make expectations 4 u!!! B who u r.... NOT who the group wants u 2 b!
heeeyyyyy r u a good friend???!!!!
Love Life Forever
1THale
Right or Wrong
Being a psy major I find myself giving advice to friends and family on a regular... but what bothers me is when some1 ask 4 advice and u give it 2 them and they immediately want 2 have a debate about the advice I jus offered! Soooo here is my unspoken truth!...enjoy!
Right and Wrong? Who makes the decision?
When ur young ur parents tell u when something is wrong. Whether or not u continue to do it, u believe in the back of ur mind that ur doing something "wrong". So now as adults we have been programmed to believe when we hear the word "wrong" we are doing something just that...wrong. Well thas not true!!!
What we as human beings have to understand is we are all different... emotionally, physically, and mentally different. Yes we agree on some things but thas only to a certain extent!
*When something feels so rite, it cant b wrong!!!!* I think this is something ppl should cherish and live by, bc its the UNSPOKEN TRUTH!!
There is no way or reason u should feel bad or wrong about something that makes u feel so good or right! No REASON! but the problem comes when we begin to hear what other ppl think. Our "friends" and family, have a huge impact on our thinking process. If u feel as if something is right and they tell u they feel as if its wrong, w/o even knowing u question ur own feelings! Crazy I kno rite... but thas one of those things we have just been conditioned to do. You have to grow mentally. The problem is we are still in our adolescent minds! We dnt know how to think on our owns. Thas why we ask for a advice, and go 2 ppl for help. And to be honest its nothing wrong with needing advice or help...but its the way u go about getting those things!
What I have found myself doing lately is...when some1 comes to me 4 advice, I ask questions 1st about how they feel about the situation and what they think they should do! what they dont realize is, Im helping them ans their own questions and solve their own problems with their own ans! I dnt want to b the 1 who tells u how u feel is wrong or right bc thas just not me! I want u 2 learn ur own life lessons, and teach urself a few things, and b happy w/how u think, not happy w/how some1else has 2 make u think! The "reality" is u have 2 b sure and positive that the things u r doing and the things u want 2 do are RIGHT 4 u! Those things will make u happy, bc @ the end of the day UR FEELINGS are all that matter! Its okay 2 ask questions(thas how we sometimes learn things) but ask urself those ques and c what ans u can give urself b4 u go and ask some1else! We, as human beings, are quick 2 tell some1 they r wrong and judge them but until u r in their situation until u r them physically, emotionally, and mentally u CANNOT judge!! Bc what may b rite 2 u, may b wrong 2 another person and vice versus!
REMEMBER 2 do these things:
1. Dnt ask questions u dnt wanna kno the ans 2!
2. Figure out b4 u even ask advice, what kind of advice r u looking 4?
-The REALITY
-The Sweet version
-OR u just want some1 2 listen 2 u
3. Dnt b afraid 2 speak out about how u feel and ur experiences... even if a whole room feels its wrong!
4. B happy about all ur choices bc if u dnt u will live ur whole life w/a lot of regrets!
In closing... GIVE ADVICE! the best 2 ur ability but dnt judge! Dnt stay whats wrong or right. Place urself in the situation and go from there. And if u do feel like something is WRONG! Jus STOP urself from getting into that persons thought process, and jus tell them 2 think 4 themselves! @ the moment they may not understand or mite just be mad at u but in the long run... THEY WILL APPRECIATE U! 4 teaching them 2 accept their happiness and believe that EVERYTHING HAPPENS 4 A REASON, GOOD OR BAD, IT ALL SERVES A PURPOSE!!
Love Life Forever!
1Thale!!!
Right and Wrong? Who makes the decision?
When ur young ur parents tell u when something is wrong. Whether or not u continue to do it, u believe in the back of ur mind that ur doing something "wrong". So now as adults we have been programmed to believe when we hear the word "wrong" we are doing something just that...wrong. Well thas not true!!!
What we as human beings have to understand is we are all different... emotionally, physically, and mentally different. Yes we agree on some things but thas only to a certain extent!
*When something feels so rite, it cant b wrong!!!!* I think this is something ppl should cherish and live by, bc its the UNSPOKEN TRUTH!!
There is no way or reason u should feel bad or wrong about something that makes u feel so good or right! No REASON! but the problem comes when we begin to hear what other ppl think. Our "friends" and family, have a huge impact on our thinking process. If u feel as if something is right and they tell u they feel as if its wrong, w/o even knowing u question ur own feelings! Crazy I kno rite... but thas one of those things we have just been conditioned to do. You have to grow mentally. The problem is we are still in our adolescent minds! We dnt know how to think on our owns. Thas why we ask for a advice, and go 2 ppl for help. And to be honest its nothing wrong with needing advice or help...but its the way u go about getting those things!
What I have found myself doing lately is...when some1 comes to me 4 advice, I ask questions 1st about how they feel about the situation and what they think they should do! what they dont realize is, Im helping them ans their own questions and solve their own problems with their own ans! I dnt want to b the 1 who tells u how u feel is wrong or right bc thas just not me! I want u 2 learn ur own life lessons, and teach urself a few things, and b happy w/how u think, not happy w/how some1else has 2 make u think! The "reality" is u have 2 b sure and positive that the things u r doing and the things u want 2 do are RIGHT 4 u! Those things will make u happy, bc @ the end of the day UR FEELINGS are all that matter! Its okay 2 ask questions(thas how we sometimes learn things) but ask urself those ques and c what ans u can give urself b4 u go and ask some1else! We, as human beings, are quick 2 tell some1 they r wrong and judge them but until u r in their situation until u r them physically, emotionally, and mentally u CANNOT judge!! Bc what may b rite 2 u, may b wrong 2 another person and vice versus!
REMEMBER 2 do these things:
1. Dnt ask questions u dnt wanna kno the ans 2!
2. Figure out b4 u even ask advice, what kind of advice r u looking 4?
-The REALITY
-The Sweet version
-OR u just want some1 2 listen 2 u
3. Dnt b afraid 2 speak out about how u feel and ur experiences... even if a whole room feels its wrong!
4. B happy about all ur choices bc if u dnt u will live ur whole life w/a lot of regrets!
In closing... GIVE ADVICE! the best 2 ur ability but dnt judge! Dnt stay whats wrong or right. Place urself in the situation and go from there. And if u do feel like something is WRONG! Jus STOP urself from getting into that persons thought process, and jus tell them 2 think 4 themselves! @ the moment they may not understand or mite just be mad at u but in the long run... THEY WILL APPRECIATE U! 4 teaching them 2 accept their happiness and believe that EVERYTHING HAPPENS 4 A REASON, GOOD OR BAD, IT ALL SERVES A PURPOSE!!
Love Life Forever!
1Thale!!!
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